Sometimes “knowing” can be detrimental:

• It can make us lazy– “I don’t have to do that because I already ‘get it.'”
• It can cause resistance–because that action seems scary and I’m not really sure I want to go there.

Regardless of how many times I think I know, I am always amazed when I humble myself and do the work. Every time I do, I rediscover something I thought I already knew.  It’s almost like I am learning for the first time, only I am able to understand it more deeply.

I call this “moving from head knowledge to heart knowledge,” and it is always facilitated by ACTION.

When I DO something with what I’ve learned, the bits information stuck in my head move into every other cell of my body. The knowledge becomes a part of my being instead of something I can access from a mental shelf in the library of my mind.  I feel more enlightened; I feel lighter, happier, more energetic… It’s incredible!

In fact, I am currently experiencing this whole body enlightenment. “Doing the Work” is a concept I thought I already knew, until (like so many times before) a challenge moved me not simply into action, but massive action.
The assignment came from David TS Wood and Lisa Nichols as a part of a speakers’ training called Amplified Train the Trainer. They challenged us participants to look for stories in the NOW of our lives instead of looking to memories of the past or visions of the future. They explained that the way we could find these “Now” stories was to say “YES!” to the opportunities of each day, and “BOTH!” if more than one opportunity arose.

I jumped in with both feet and created so many stories by saying Yes! to being an active participant in each (or many more than usual) moment of my life. I said yes to dancing; wearing lipstick; going down the slide with my grandson, Lukas; playing darts and shuffle board with my family. I had conversations with beautiful people on the subways of New York City, slept on a mattress with my daughter Madyson on the floor of the Brooklyn apartment that we called home for 5 days. I drove Dave’s huge duel cab Chevy truck to California to help my daughter Arielle move from LA to her new apartment in Laguna Niguel, for heaven’s sake! (That one took a lot of intestinal fortitude…)

Each of these moments has positively impacted my life, along with many more I haven’t mentioned. The most impactful Yes!, however, is the #100DaysofLaughter challenge that my Australian friend and accountability partner, Tammy Richie, created. We were speaking on the phone (via FaceBook–coolest thing ever) for our daily accountability call. I was Christmas shopping at Ulta, and she was in the children’s ward of her local hospital while her son recovered from surgery. As we spoke, two singing clowns entered the hospital room. Apparently they came by often to spread happiness to the kids (and parents,) so Tammy had formed a relationship with them. She called them over, handed them her phone, and said, “Here! Talk to my friend, Cary. She is from the United States.” They took the phone and sang a song to me and about me that they created as they went. It was hilarious! When they handed the phone back to Tammy, she commented on how good it felt to laugh for a moment. Then (in typical Tammy form) she created the idea for this laughter challenge. “Let’s look for reasons to laugh out loud every day for 100 days and post videos about it on FaceBook. We can start a happiness movement!” And the challenge was born.

I haven’t typically been one to laugh out loud. I smile and laugh on the inside–cuz that’s just who I am–but (true to Cary form) once I committed, I was compelled to do it. Today is Day 49. I cannot tell you the power this has had on my life!! I feel free! I feel joyful! I feel empowered!

The post I Can’t Say Enough about ACTION first appeared on Cary MacArthur.

The post I Can’t Say Enough about ACTION appeared first on Cary MacArthur.

“Alive on the Outside.”

The content was based on a new realization I had as I participated in an Amplified Train the Trainer event with master trainers, David TS Wood and Colin James. While the apparent goal of the training was to improve our on-stage presentation skills, the stage is used as a metaphor for life:

“How you do anything is how you do everything. You bring yourself with you to the stage.”

I’ve heard David Wood say these words many times, and I thought that I understood them. Yet, as I sat in the audience on the 2nd day of training, I heard them with new ears. A wave of emotion washed over me that was different than I had experienced at other trainings. It wasn’t my typical breakdown; it was a breakTHROUGH! A voice inside of me said “It’s time.”

• Time to live my life as if I am training to be on the big stage, which means I have to SHOW UP completely as MYSELF
• Time to let my thoughts and feelings be seen and heard
• Time to move bigger, speak stronger, and laugh out loud

As my mentor, Dr. Denim L. Slade, often tells me, it’s time to “Make the covert overt,” to which I often argue “I AM! That’s what I’ve been working so hard to do for the past 5 years!” Reality, however, is that while I have taken steps in the direction of “Discovering My Voice,” I still have no idea what my full voice sounds like. Although I’m much more open than I used to be, the part of me that I allow to be seen has m-a-y-b-e approached 50% once or twice, and is most often about 20-25%. And now it is time to make another climb.

“I want–no, I NEED–to be on that stage,” I felt my determined little internal voice say, “whatever that stage is.” It was more clear to me than ever before. “And if I continue to just think and feel it without speaking and acting on it, nobody will ever know.”

The thought was both frightening and empowering at the same time.  I felt that all too familiar anguish of paralyzing fear rise up and try to choke out any commitment I might make to dig deeper. Instead of giving in, I promised myself that I was going to start that very moment to speak up and act out. I must share my thoughts and the desires of my heart, and I must move my body into obvious action. No more wishing from the sidelines…
My first action was to share the urgency I felt to stay an extra day in Vancouver for VIP day, which was a more intimate and intensive training. Speaking my intention wasn’t easy and, to be honest, it was quite messy at first. I immediately began to doubt my decision and give up before I started. However, part of my personality is that when I make a promise to myself, I refuse to break it, so I had no choice but to persist. Persistence paid, and I stayed. VIP Day was wonderful! The benefits of attending definitely outweighed the “pain” of speaking up. I left feeling powerful and on top of the world. “I’ve got this! This time ‘stepping through fears’ will be easier than it was before.”

Would you be surprised if I said “I spoke too soon?”

As I explained in my video, I was blindsided by a simple game of pool. I’m still awestruck by the rush of paralyzing emotions that emerged just because my husband handed me a pool stick and insisted I play. I would have loved to have buried my head in the sand and disappeared forever…what a silly and ridiculous reason to feel afraid!  Still, I had made a promise–so to up my level of accountability to myself, I made it public on FaceBook and asked my friends to hold me accountable as well. Again, I was completely taken by surprise by the tears and the ugly cry voice that couldn’t be hidden as I shared my intentions.  I felt more ashamed than ever, and even more committed. If I am going to cry on live video, there is NO WAY I am giving up!  (Click here to view the video)
Since that game of pool, I have done at least one thing every day that has scared me:

• jumped on the trampoline with my grandson
• had a vulnerable conversation with a loved one
• visited my neighbors for the first time since they moved in
• attended a pottery class with a friend
• asked someone for help

On the outside, these things don’t seem much different from what I thought I had been doing already. Although I have continued to “step through fears,” the level vulnerability has become comfortable. Many of them pertain to events or to people that are just outside my closest circle; there’s still a certain level of separation that keeps me playing safe–a new level of safe, but safe nonetheless. I felt like what I had been doing was good enough…

…until I felt a soft whisper that pierced my soul…

“It’s time to dig deeper.”

Dig deeper! Push my own boundaries! Pierce through another layer of protection until I find the fulness of me that has been buried for most of my life! I thought I had broken down the glass walls I have been living behind, and now I see that I only cracked the surface; the real break through is yet to come. My heart is exploding once again… Oh man! The thought brings such emotion!! Am I ready??

I can’t NOT be ready. It’s my time.

The post Alive on the Outside: Making the Covert Overt first appeared on Cary MacArthur.

The post Alive on the Outside: Making the Covert Overt appeared first on Cary MacArthur.