Or at least I thought I was grateful.

It was a passive gratitude—grateful for what I thought was good in my life and accepting the rest as “meant to be.”

In her research, Brené Brown (author of  The Gift of Imperfection) discovered that people who describe themselves as joyful actually practiced gratitude!

Instead of being grateful for what they already had in their lives, joyful people were grateful first!

In the words of BrotherDavid Steindl-Rast, “It is not happiness that makes us grateful, but gratefulness that makes us happy.”

Since I was on my own pursuit of happiness, I decided to stop being grateful and to begin a gratitude practice. It really makes a difference!

What does a gratitude practice look like? It’s simple, really.

• Actively look for reasons to be grateful about everything.

• Instead of simply saying “I’m thankful for…,” add “because…” and finish the sentence.

• Perform at least one random act of kindness every day.

I can honestly say that my life, now that I make a daily effort to live in active gratitude, is a joyful life.

I intentionally look for all of the good that surrounds me—even in the hard stuff—and I seize opportunities to experience this miracle that we call life.

It’s amazing how deeply joyful I feel—and everyday I receive even more to be grateful for.

One of the things I feel especially grateful for in this very moment is YOU! Thank you for being a part of my life.

Happy Thanksgiving!

The post Gratitude first appeared on Cary MacArthur.

The post Gratitude appeared first on Cary MacArthur.

I wake up early every morning–at least an hour before anyone else is awake. It’s my favorite time of the day. I crave the clear and peaceful feeling of those hours before the sun comes up.  My mind works best when it is rested and has no outside noise to distract my thinking.

Study, Prayer, and Meditation:

• I begin by “sitting in my chair” and visualizing my purpose. This visualization includes personal study time–usually beginning with scripture and often moving to a deeper study of a concept or question that stands out to me–and meditation–sitting still, getting quiet, praying. I do this until I feel connected to my Higher Power (which to me is the Godhead: God the Father; His Son, Jesus Christ; and the Holy Ghost.)  This connection gives me an inner strength that and opens me up to intuition/personal revelation.

Journaling:

• Next,  I go to my journal(s) and write. I like to start by writing about my “favorite memory from the past 24 hours” in detail. Favorite memories feel good and put me in a high vibrational state as I move into a new day.
• Next I write three things that I am grateful for. I do this every day. Gratitude puts me in a state of gladness, knowing that no matter what, my life is always amazing.
• In another journal, I record any ah-has, thoughts and ideas I may have received during my study time.
• Occasionally, in yet another journal, I process limiting thoughts and beliefs that could potentially hold me back if I don’t first name them and then tame them.

How do study, meditation, and journaling help me find courage?
As I mentioned before, study and mediation are the catalyst to my journal time. They provide the thoughts that move through my pen and onto my journal pages. Journaling is very powerful for me–it helps me to discover my innermost feelings and desires, which leads me to discover the “next step” out of my comfort zone. This is the part where Introspection meets Courage–where the rubber meets the road.

(Click here  to learn more about the  power of journaling  from one of my phenomenal coaches, Kim Ades.)

To paraphrase Brene Brown’s definition of courage,

Courage comes from connecting to your heart and allowing it to be seen.

My study and meditation time connects me to my heart, and by journaling immediately after that connection is established, I am able to reveal my heart to myself and feel the parts that are yearning to come out of hiding and be seen.

The process has been revealing to me in many ways. When it was new, I fought the impressions I received. I battled with the fear of opening my heart box and worked hard to convince myself that no one needed to see all that I have inside of me. I tried to tell myself that none of it mattered. Still, the power of my morning process was real enough to keep me committed. It has brought clarity to my purpose; it has shown me that many of my “fears” are tied to things that I have always wanted to do but have been afraid of being seen. This realization has given me courage to share my inner desires that have been locked in my fear box for so long.  With the help of beautiful mentors, I have been able to define the necessary action steps that are moving me out of my box and into the most exhilarating freedom!

It feels SO good to do be doing the things that I have been telling myself for so long that I couldn’t do.

I don’t completely understand why we human beings do this to ourselves – how we can want something so much and yet forbid ourselves to pursue it. At the same time, I get it.  We all long for safety, and sometimes we believe that we are safest when we don’t take risks. The irony of it all is that the opposite is true–safety comes from taking risks, from being seen and heard.
Most of the fears we feel are based on our interpretation of what we think might happen, and usually our stories cause us to believe that it’s going to way worse than it really is. By facing my fears, I have learned that not only was it nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be, most of the time I also discovered that “the other side” is way better than I ever imagined it could be! Feeling fear has almost become an obsession for me, and one of my greatest desires is that by allowing people to watch me continually expand my own safety zone, I can inspire them to do the same.

Life is a gift! It is meant to be lived! And there truly is more happiness on the “other side.”

https://goo.gl/images/VpZCVW

The post My Secret to Courage: It Starts with Morning Rituals first appeared on Cary MacArthur.

The post My Secret to Courage: It Starts with Morning Rituals appeared first on Cary MacArthur.

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” -Brené Brown

But what if you don’t want to be heard?

That’s what I used to think. I mean, I loved people; I totally felt it was OK to be connected TO people–to enjoy their stories, their personalities, their joys–to help them through through their hard times and their sorrows–but to do that at a distance, as sort of an invisible source that could float in, light their candle, and then leave.

Imagine the anguish when I learned this wasn’t possible! This video explains the beginning of my story:

I love the path that I am on! Connections are beginning to happen, and I am learning that I love being heard and seen. And I’m just getting started!

COME JOIN THE CONVERSATION AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK OVER ON FACEBOOK.

The post Connection first appeared on Cary MacArthur.

The post Connection appeared first on Cary MacArthur.